-This is My Suicide-

MICHAEL JACKSON August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009 I practically grew up listening and watching MJ . I love MJ , I always sang his songs and tried to copy his moves as a child. Who can for get all the great singles? Beat It, Billie Jean, Bad, Thriller, Smooth Criminal, Black or White. He was amazing even in Jackson 5. He is the King of Pop. He has the best dance moves, the best voice and his performances were always awesome! He loves his fans and never fails them. No one can replace him nor be any better than him. Everyone loves Michael. During the later years the press were always dissing him and the paparazzi were following him everywhere and all the lawsuits . It's enough to kill anyone. Now that he's gone there saying about all the good things about him! Isn't it too late?!?! He did many great things and contributed to society tremendously ! He loved helping the needy! After he got I'll he still did, I'm sure he had many magnificent dreams that he wished he coul...

I never thought I'd die alone I laughed the loudest who'd have known? I traced the cord back to the wall No wonder it was never plugged in at all I took my time, I hurried up The choice was mine, I didn't think enough I'm too depressed to go on You'll be sorry when I'm gone I never conquered, rarely came Sixteen just held such better days Days when I still felt alive We couldn't wait to get outside The world was wide, too late to try The tour was over we'd survived I couldn't wait till I got home To pass the time in my room alone I never thought I'd die alone Another six months I'll be unknown Give all my things to all my friends You'll never step foot in my room again You'll close it off, board it up Remember the time that I spilled the cup Of apple juice in the hall Please tell mom this is not her fault I never conquered, rarely came Sixteen just held such better days Days when I still felt alive We couldn't wait to get outside ...

Life it seems, will fade away Drifting further everyday Getting lost within myself Nothing matters no one else I have lost the will to live Simply nothing more to give There is nothing more for me Need the end to set me free Things not what they used to be Missing one inside of me Deathly lost this can't be real Can't stand this hell i feel Emptiness is filling me To the point of agony Growing darkness taking dawn I was me, but now he's gone No one but me can save myself, but it's too late Now I can't think, think why I should even try Yesterday seems as though it never existed Death greets me warm, now I will just say goodbye

I pretend I care but actually I'm too tired to bother I try to be responsible but in fact I just want a new beginning I'm sick of everything but I continue to smile I'm being what you've told me to be to continue to please you Cuz I don't know who I am and what I want to do anymore I try to be a good person because I screwed up most of my life And I need the need of feeling needed I need the need to feel important Because I don't have anything else to feel good about I'm totally lost in sorrow and hurt I shut myself away from everyone Cuz I can't trust anyone anymore I try not to get too attached Because I know for a fact that I have to depart later And I cannot handle anymore pain Inside I'm screaming and crying everyday I can't handle life anymore Yet I hold on and try my best not to end my life Because I promised those who love me I give it all I got But I'm sorry if I kill myself in the end It's hard trying to hold on I wish I never h...

*sigh* What's the point of living? Can I continue fighting? I'm exhausted. I feel frustrated to do anything. I wish life would end. I'm not motivated.... I feel like I'm drowning in my own sorrows....

I feel so messed up. This week is cursed. I didn't do well in my mid-terms. I screw up in school. I screw up in ministry. I feel like an emotional wreck. I'm so depressed I can't get myself to go to school, do my homework and go to tuition. I'm so overwhelmed with emotions, I don't know what I feel anymore. I'm empty and tired. I just wanna cry. I'm regretting not killing myself when I tried. I'm crying and screaming inside. I'm lost and I feel so hopeless and guilty. I don't know what to do with myself.